The Final Showdown

After months of rebellion, I finally decided to give into the system. I had my hair trimmed. As I sat in the saloon, waiting for the "hair designer" to finish his job, I was looking at myself in the mirror transforming from a hippie into mama's little boy. It looked like I was growing younger with every snip of the scissors. Finally when I got out of that place, my head felt so light and nice. All that constant irritation and fidgeting was gone. No more checking if my hairs were standing up like horns. I was finally a free person.

Till I got home.

I looked in the mirror aghast. I couldn't recognize myself. Woah! I realized that this was going to be a serious identity problem. I looked like a long lost version of myself. I never thought I'd look like this anymore. I mean other people many recognize me but I have trouble relating to this new look.

Oh! And the feeling of having to give into the system, not good.

Year One

It's been one year. Yes, I have finally become an "experienced" software professional. Yesterday marked the completion of one year of life in the "real world", a life radically different from the college life we had. I still remember the night of June 21, 2004. I came back to my hotel room, depressed beyond measure. I told my parents that I dont want to go back. Maybe the experience wouldn't seem so bad now (now that I an "old hand"), but then, my first taste of the real world was bitter indeed. And thus started a 3 month ordeal that in the end, left me hopeless, ready to give up on this cruel cruel world. Then things started happening fast, and before long, all signs of my former life were eradicated. The memories took the longest to disappear but even they eventually left, leaving me with happy memories and experiences. And here I am now, 22, and still going strong, stronger from all the countless hardships that life threw at me in just one year. I know that I have a long long life ahead (oh I tend to be optimistic about my lifespan) and what I have dealt with, as of now, is just a small taste of things to come. But Year One has served to make me stronger and more capable of withstanding 'the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune'.

"I think I am ready to do this.. Finally..."

Breaking the fast....

Finally, after months(??) of fasting (in the mornings), I had breakfast today. The food wasn't anything to write home about but it sated my hunger alright. It felt good ( and btw, necessary too for I was burning with hunger) having breakfast. After having the food, I walked back home and the walk in the cold morning breeze refreshed me, sharpening my senses, shaking off the last flakes of sleep in them.

Well, today served to make me realize that breakfast plays an important role in our daily routine - not just for the body, but for the mind too. For when I left, I was sleepy and groggy but I came back refreshed and full of energy. Hmmmm I should have breakfast more often.

[N.B: I am feeling hungry again! Prolly because I didn't have dinner yesterday. *Sigh*]

Yet another resolution...

If Health is Wealth, then I guess I've been bankrupt for quite a while now. My sedentary, indolent life-style has ruined my health almost beyond repair. Or atleast I think it's not yet beyond repair. So many resolutions have been made in this regard and all have gone down the /dev/null path. Eat less. Eat less meat. Walk more. Excercise daily. All these were decided upon readily but never adhered to. I guess this inertia of rest is an inherent character flaw of mine and would take a while weeding out. I mean I am not even able to finish coding a simple program!!! I stop that mid-way with 'Why bother? It's already done by someone else. I am wasting my time'. I conveniently chose to ignore the fact that the purpose of writing it was to prove to myself that I can still code.

So with these thoughts in mind, I have decided to start making a change. I had given up on Linux earlier. I have decided to take it up again. I have decided that I should start learning again. I used to be known for my ability to learn stuff fast. I will re-kindle that. I have decided to devote more time to studying. With that, I hope to retard or even reverse my mental degradation.

About my body, I think it needs more immediate attention than my mind. For, the signs of decadence have been showing for quite a while now. The frequent back and neck aches, trouble climbing stairs, inability to walk beyond a mile - if I dont do something, "I'm going down"!

So with this blog entry, I mark yet another attempt to revitalize my mental and physical health. I hope, by bringing this to the attention of people, I would have someone prodding me to do this and do that. I am not sure this resolution would go too far without some external help.

*Sigh*

When it rains, it pours..

Literally. And metaphorically. Bad days don't come alone. They bring the whole damn family with them. After that terrible ordeal, I was hoping for life to be calm and relaxed atleast for a while. Yet, here I was caught in another disastrous day.

It was supposed to be a good day. A happy day. Everything was planned. I was supposed to go home. The ticket obtained after much blood and sweat. Well, actualy phone calls mostly. Anyway, a hard-earned ticket. And I was going home.

But it rained...

Not the usual pleasant drizzle, or the soothing dark downpour... A cold, 'haily' torrential downpour that threatened to wash away all civilization. After waiting for a long time, I decided to make a move. Nearing the lane where my house was, I was a bit surprised to see the roads submerged in water. Deciding to wade through, I rolled up my jeans and stepped into the filth. I still go 'yuck!' when I think of that. Wading through Bangalore's filth.

Much to my dismay, the further I went, the deeper it got. By the time I reached our lane, it was several inches above my knee. Some people had taken refuge in an office building and urged me not to risk it. So I climbed in with them. And the water level kept rising.

From 4:30 to 8:15 pm, I stood there, contemplating my watery fate. Finally, the water level had gone down enough for me to wade home. Nearing my house, I noticed that it was several inches deeper than the part till where i had waded. If I had continued wading home, I would've been submerged. I went into the house, fully expecting a terrible state of affairs. And terrible it was. All our shoes, bags, some clothes, were all ruined. Apparenlty there was a few inches of standing water inside the house.

Thankful to have gotten home alive, I went upstairs to freshen up. Soon, we were cleaning up the mess and managed to make the place look normal again. Ravaged by hunger, we ordered food. Eager to quiet the rumbling of our stomaches, we attacked the food with a frenzy born of hunger and exhaustion.

And the power failed...

I hate this day...